About the Writer
I figured I’d take a moment to introduce myself to those who are new here. And if you’ve been around for a while, feel free to stay — I’ve always been better at getting my thoughts down on paper than speaking in front of a camera.
My name is Bri. I was born in California, raised in Nebraska, and now call Northeast Iowa home, where I live with my husband and our four lively, electric kids—ages fifteen, twelve, and our two eight-year-olds. Our little crew also includes three dogs and six chickens, because animals have always been my kind of therapy.
The Reflection Project came to life during my third (and final) attempt at therapy after experiencing one of the most traumatic events a person can go through. When my world fell apart, it felt like every piece of my past collapsed with it — childhood trauma, poor life choices, and the person I had become. I resented that version of myself. I could barely stand the thought of her.
But that pain brought clarity. I started to understand why family ties had broken, why friendships faded, and why relationships failed. I saw how often I sought validation instead of connection — how I bulldozed through life, thinking I was “unapologetically myself,” when in truth, I was being selfish, careless, and everything that makes a narcissist, narcissistic. I lacked empathy, accountability, and integrity. I played the victim instead of owning my part. Do you now see why I couldn’t bear the thought of her?
It took the most devastating moment of my life to finally wake up. I realized I was heading toward loneliness — or worse, death. Between the drinking, the company I was choosing to surround myself with, and the darkness in my mind, I was disappearing. But one look at my (at the time) four-year-old son changed everything. I knew I had to become the mother he needed — someone he could depend on, learn from, and be proud of. I realized I did have purpose, even if in that moment I didn’t feel I deserved a second chance.
So I chose to rebuild. To heal. To find peace in place of chaos.
Nearly four years later, I’m not perfect — but I am present, self-aware, and grounded. I’ve learned empathy, compassion, and honesty. I’ve grown into someone who loves life again. I’m a better mother, a better partner, and a better human. My husband is my best friend, my kids are my everything and every day I remind myself that progress, not perfection, is what truly matters. I tend to feel strongly about what is important to me, and tend to voice them from time to time with sometimes getting carried away. I’m choosing to channel this energy toward this blog instead of social media, so you won’t find me on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter.
People often ask why I’m willing to share my story so openly online — or warn me about what others might think. My answer is simple: I might be ashamed of who I was, but I’m not ashamed of who I am now. Nobody can throw my past in my face because I have accepted and made peace with the absolute darkest parts of my life. Change is possible. It’s slow. It’s hard. But it’s worth every single step, and I choose to continue because I’m in this for the long haul.
The Reflection Project is my space to share that truth. I’ll be posting weekly reflections from my journey in hopes that they reach the people who need to hear them most.
If my story resonates with you — or if you’d like to share your own — I would love to hear from you. Let’s grow together.
