If there's one thing about my life as a parent and stepparent, it's that our calendar is rarely empty. Between school, work, practices, performances, appointments, and everything else that comes with raising a family, there always seems to be somewhere we need to be or something we need to get done.
And you know what? I absolutely love it.
Right now, we're entering another busy season with our daughter involved in theatre and the boys getting into wrestling. It's a whole new round of schedules, practices, running around, and figuring out who needs to be where and when. As always, it feels like we're constantly on the go, and by the time we finally settle in for the evening, I'm wondering where the day even went. But there's something about watching your kids participate in things they're passionate about that makes all the chaos worth it.
I've been thinking a lot lately about my own childhood and teenage years, especially high school. I wasn't necessarily the person who had the confidence to put myself out there. There were things I might have enjoyed trying, but I didn't always have the drive, motivation, or belief in myself to actually pursue them. Sometimes it was easier to stay within my comfort zone than risk being uncomfortable, embarrassed, or simply not being good at something. Sure I participated in a few school activities, but looking back, I wonder what I might have experienced had I given myself a little more grace and a lot more confidence. But now, as a parent, I get to watch my kids do some of the very things I struggled to find the courage to do myself.
There's something incredibly special about that.
Watching our daughter step into theatre, putting herself out there in a way that takes confidence, creativity, and vulnerability, makes me so incredibly proud. Theatre isn't just about memorizing lines or getting on a stage. It's about being willing to be seen, trying something new, working alongside others, and learning to trust yourself.
Then there are the boys and wrestling. A completely different environment, but one that requires just as much courage. Wrestling takes discipline, patience, determination, and the willingness to get back up when something doesn't go your way. They're continuing to learn that not everything comes easily, that hard work matters, and that sometimes you have to lose a few matches before you figure out how to win.
How lucky I am to get a front-row seat to all of it.
I get to watch them try, succeed, struggle, get frustrated, improve, and occasionally surprise themselves with what they're capable of.
Of course, I'd be lying if I said the constant running around doesn't get exhausting sometimes. There are evenings when I'd love nothing more than to put on comfortable clothes, make dinner, crochet or read a book, and spend the rest of the night doing absolutely nothing. There are days when the calendar looks ridiculous and I wonder how we're going to fit everything in, but then I remember that this is the stuff. These are the years we'll eventually look back on. The practices we rushed to after school. The quick dinners. The conversations in the car. The excitement before a performance. The nerves before a match. The celebrations afterward, whether things went exactly as planned or not. I don't want to rush through any of it.
Something I've come to realize as I've gotten older is that being a parent doesn't mean your children need to live out the opportunities you missed. I don't want them doing things simply because I didn't. I want them to explore their own interests, discover what makes them happy, and develop the confidence to try things even when they're unsure of themselves. If they don’t feel comfortable participating in an activity, or tried an activity and didn’t have a true passion for it, that’s okay! It boils down to if they fall in love with an activity, wonderful. If they decide something isn't for them, that's okay too.
I just want them to know they have people standing behind them, cheering them on, encouraging them to keep going, and reminding them that they don't have to be the best at something for it to be worth doing. Maybe that's something I needed to hear a little more when I was younger, too, and perhaps that's one of the unexpected gifts of parenting. Sometimes, while we're busy helping our children grow into who they're becoming, we're also learning a little more about the people we used to be.
So, for now, we'll keep juggling the schedules, showing up to practices, sitting in the audience, cheering from the sidelines, and probably eating more meals on the go than I'd like to admit because one day, the wrestling shoes will be put away. The theatre performances will become memories. Our evenings will get quieter, and we won't have nearly as many places to be.
And as much as I sometimes crave a quiet evening now, I have a feeling I'll miss this beautiful chaos when it's gone.
For now, I'm just grateful I get to be part of it.
